Romance...My Way

I found the title of this blog hop too irresistible to ignore. Romance...My Way.

For those who don’t know me, I have subversive tendencies. I like overturning apple carts, breaking a few rules, stepping outside the norm, so Scorching Book Review’s idea – Romance...My Way – really appealed. Each post in the hop pays homage to the writer’s favourite trope in romance - secret baby, brooding boss, friends turned lovers – and there’s a $50 GIFT CARD GRAND PRIZE to be won. To enter go to the Rafflecopter link at the bottom of this post.


– just comment on this post to go into the drawer (English language countries only). Winners announced on 20th February via FACEBOOK and Ecstasy Files blog post.

The usual tropes in romance often involve traditional heroes – the bad boy, the cowboy, the rich boss, the dark dom. It was only a few days ago I realised many of them don’t appeal to me –except perhaps the bad boy, I do like a motorbike, tattoo and seductive stare. I was on my way home listening to SCHMULTZ FM (because all the other radio stations were plain annoying – blah, blah, blah!) when this song came on:

I’m guessing most women who had a man sing this to her with any sincerity would be a gooey, smoochy mess. But as I listened to the words it struck me – I don’t want a hero. At least, not THAT kind of a hero. Which probably makes me a rare female, since heroes like Enrique are peppered through romance as liberally as salt on fish and chips.

I’m not an alpha male girl. A brawny bloke bossing me around is more likely to get a knuckle sandwich than into my pants. I find the idea of a man coming along wanting to ‘rescue’ me from all my ‘inner pain’ kind of annoying. Thanks anyway but I can do it myself. These days the only thing I need help with is getting the lid off the damned jam jar!

My favourite trope is a little more dangerous – Casanova, Rudolph Valentine, Don Juan – the masterful lover.

I want a hero who won’t rescue me so much as ravish me. My kind of hero doesn’t want me to need him. He appreciates my strength to stand on my own two feet and that I use my own resources and talent to reach for the stars. He appreciates I might need the occasional restorative hug and maybe a pep talk – but it never involves ‘step away from that and let me do it for you, darling, then I’ll kiss away your pain’. (Unless we’re talking about a jar of jam, then he can kiss my pain all he likes.)

Romance my way entails a man who has brains on top of the brawn and, most importantly, respect. For women. As a species. And for himself. My hero is self assured, so he doesn’t need to use women as a vehicle to make himself feel more powerful, strong, wanted, important {fill in the blank}. He’s his own man, self contained, self confident, smart.

Now THAT is a romance trope with a hero worthy of a hearty gush on my part. I absolutely loved the character Don Juan (played by the very glorious and heroic Johnny Depp) in the movie Don Juan deMarco. He won me heart, mind and soul when he said:

“Now there are those, of course, who do not share my perceptions, it’s true. When I say that all my women are dazzling beauties, they object. The nose of this one is too large; the hips of another, they are too wide; perhaps the breasts of a third, they are too small. But I see these women for how they truly are… glorious, radiant, spectacular, and perfect, because, I am not limited by my eyesight. Women react to me the way that they do, Don Octavio, because they sense that I search out the beauty that dwells within until it overwhelms everything else. And then they cannot avoid their desire, to release that beauty and envelope me in it.”

Gotta love a man who cherishes the essence of femininity. And it is this man that I seem to recreate in my stories. He is Ramon Mendez, from my Master of Love series. And like Don Juan, he would also say:

“There are only four questions of value in life... What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same: only love.”


What romance trope/hero gets your blood pumping?


Check out the other way blogs (thanks Scorching Book Reviews! x)

Enter the draw for $50 gift card via Rafflecopter here.


Got to say I want help opening the bottle of wine more than the jam jar! Found myself in agreement--who wants a bossy boots when one can be inspired by a Ramon-type character!

Another good post, Kate. Always enjoy your observations.


KateBelle.X's picture

Thanks for dropping by Susanne, and the wine bottle is probably more important but I rarely have trouble opening those! X

I very much love Alpha males!!! I like menage stories and BDSM stories.
Thanks for the great giveaway!!
Ashley A

KateBelle.X's picture

Hi Ashley, I know I'm probably the exception in not liking them much. Most women seem to love them. Thanks for commenting and good luck in the blog hop.

I like edgy mixed with erotic...menage, bdsm, dub-con...something to really get me thinking and engrossed :)


KateBelle.X's picture

Hi Stacey, Edgy appeals to me too. maybe I have latent Alpha attraction just waiting for the right kinds guy. ;)

I would have to say I love an Alpha Male! I like a take charge kinda man!
Thanks for sharing

I love an Alpha male! I like the take charge attitude that they display! Thanks for sharing

KateBelle.X's picture

See, I told you I was in the minority! Thanks for dropping by Amy.

I like the underestimated boy-next-door type who winds up surprising everybody (or at least his love)!


KateBelle.X's picture

Yeah, he's kinds cool too. The surprise is always worth waiting for cause it's usually damned sexy!

Sing it, sister! I love my men who appreciate women and are very much the Casanova, Don Juan type. Alpha males just don't do it for me, so you may be in the minority, but I'll be hanging there with you!

KateBelle.X's picture

Yay! I've found a kindred spirit! Thanks Alli! x

I can't stand alpha males! Give me a sweetie who makes me melt any day.

KateBelle.X's picture

You and me both Kerrie. Honey catches a lot more flies than vinegar. Although, I don't want to catch flies... perhaps that's not the best analogy...

Great choice of trope and the trouble with this bloghop, the more I see other's tropes, the more I realise I like. I never thought about it that deeply before. Anyone who mentions Johnny Depp gets my vote any day. Oh yeah, one more thing, that problem you have with jam jars, I can recommend a great little utensil for that - no more sore hands. ;)

KateBelle.X's picture

Hey Diane,

Yes I know what you mean. And Mr Depp has entertained us with so many tropes - the drunken pirate is one of my fave's. And at the moment I have a bloke with very storng hands to deal with the jam jar - but if every he's out I know who to call!

tortured hero bn100candg at hotmail dot com

KateBelle.X's picture

Ah yes. The broken man in dire need of redemption. Been a sucker for those all my sad life! 

I like friends to lovers.
Thanks for the chance to win!
natasha_donohoo_8 at hotmail dot com

KateBelle.X's picture

I think Friend to Lovers are one of the most convincing tropes. Good luck Natasha.

My favorite romance tropes are enemies to friends and opposites attract. Love Johnny Depp in his many movie roles. Thanks for the great giveaway!

KateBelle.X's picture

A fellow JD fan, yay! Thanks and good luck.

I married an alpha male but I like reading about all types. I like reading about how the characters interact and their relationship forms and develops. Sometimes I think, I would totally be like that and other times I'm like "slap him" but as long as I'm entertained that's really why I read.


KateBelle.X's picture

Shannon I can only assume your alpha partner doesn't incite you to slap him too often (unless he specifically asks) I do agree, I have read a few alpha characters I could go for. Cari Silverwood writes very likeable Doms. You should check her out sometime. 

I really enjoy a large variety of romance stories, from historical to futuristic, paranormals, bad boy bikers, everything from MF to menages, MM, etc. It really depends on my mood at the moment. But I definitely want all the characters to be strong and intelligent. Even if I am reading a BDSM story I don't want the submissive to be a doormat (nothing sexy about that). Btw, I love Enrique :)
manning_J2004 at yahoo dot com

KateBelle.X's picture

Oh June, don't get me wrong. I'm a huge Enrique fan too. I'd just never really listened to the words of that song too closely before.i agree heroes have to be smart. Dumb brawn just doesn't wash with me. Thanks for dropping by. X

I too read a variety of genre's, but they all have one thing in common; Alpha Males! And I so love a Bad Boy *winks*

KateBelle.X's picture

I get you! I have a thing for the rough and ready look of a bad boy. Something about them tells you you'll have a good time with them, right?

Me, I'm an alpha male type of gal, though I love my independence as well. ;)
My favorite trope is probably enemies lovers. To me, it heightens the passion (most of the time).
Thank you for the wonderful giveaway and participating in the hop.
trb0917 at gmail dot com

KateBelle.X's picture

Hi Tina, I'm sorry it took a little while to get to your comment. The enemies to lovers trope is a popular one for movies too. I love it in adventures like Jewel of the Nile. Thanks for dropping by.

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